Just wanted to post these notes from the latest Bindlestiff Studio’s Stories High Reading series for my 10-minute, Leaving My <3 In SF. Even though I don't know who wrote these, I'm very thankful for the time that they put in to write anything down! Thanks! Now, to get the final done soon. Hopefully, I'll be able to have some time to do another reading with the final:
Leaving My Heart in San Francisco
- Ending sorta muddled – don’t think Mrs. Ayala is well-developed with son – how did he die? Too serious as a comedy!
- In the story, they talked about the mother having a bag with “something.” In discussion, we couldn’t figure out if it was a heart or a conclusion.
- Very dark, ha ha. You are a great writer but could be better developed as far as the context/background. I like how you keep us “wondering” though.
- The mother character is very creepy! What do you want the tone of your piece to be?
- Nice and unique payoff with the postcards.
- Script is very funny, touching and original. Pacing of reading is good and should be kept.
- Funny stuff. Didn’t think lion heart and chicken shit part was too effective. Can’t wait to see it in action.
- I thought this play was very deep. You could feel Cora’s pain. Also had humor.
- Funny! Especially the hearts lamb part.
- Strong energy, good performance by mother Ayala, cryptic- she emotes well.
- Unique script, great acting.
- The lady in the pink did really well! I like her accent. AWWWW!! I like this one too!