It had been a day of many previous where it was the time of official torture when I would log into the San Francisco State’s website to check on my status of admittance. Being the impatient Internet troll that I am, I’ve already found forums where there had been others whom have been notified of their own academic fate. I also knew that offers needed to be accepted by May 1. Two weeks isn’t enough time to make a major life decision, I thought. So, I sit in front of my computer expecting to see “Application Pending” AGAIN as it has said for the every single day for the last two months of checking.
“Congratulations! You’ve been accepted to San Francisco State University.” Wha? Where’d that come from? I checked the name on the screen to make sure it read my name. OMG. The merging of emotions and memory swept over me knocking me senseless. Wha?
Trying to make sense of what is in front of me made me move myself in front of a co-worker of whom I’ve shared this dream with. She calmed my frazzled nerves, congratulated me, and asked if I was going to accept.
Sidenote: the online status read that I was accepted to the Master’s (MA) program. Which is GREAT! But I wouldn’t be honest if I said that I was a tinge sad that it didn’t say MFA because that’s what I had initially applied for. Through a suggestion of a person already in the program, on the application, there’s a checkbox to apply to the MA program if not admitted into the MFA Program. So since the online offer stated Masters, I assumed MA. Which is fine, perfect even. The reason I’m going back to school is to become a better playwright. Period. And the analysis of scripts and the academic discussion thereof, will help me do so. MA it is. Then I had a little panic when I researched the program a little more – according to the Program descriptions, the MFA allows the student to go to school Part-time, but I didn’t see the same text for the MA. I need my job! I have a mortgage to pay and my credit sucks so I don’t think anyone will loan me money. The only way I could pursue this dream is to do full-time work/part-time school, at least initially. If this wasn’t possible… well, I didn’t want to think about that scenario just yet.
Feeling a little defeat from the onset of reality, I needed to confirm my offer status into the MA Program. A looping passage of classical music just made me more antsy as I waited for the Grad Studies program person to confirm my Status. “Are you sure?” was all I could mumble (I have a habit of mumbling) when the voice on the other end said
“Masters of Fine Arts”. “Master of Fine Arts?” “MFA” “Uh. Okay. Thanks.”
Holy Mother of Cannonballs! The hairs on my arms became erect above the goose pimples of shock and joy and disbelief and wonder. There’s only maybe 10 slots for a very competitive program – and my odd shape fits into one of them.
Well, that makes my decision to accept a little easier. Oh, I should also say that SFSU was the only school I applied to. I’m 40 and this was a calculated decision based on reality – even though this is still a dream. Location. Cost. The Bay Area theatre community.
Waiting for my feet to touch the ground.